Probably going to abandon this blog for a new more anonymous one

I wanted to blog to talk shit. Sensible shit, but shit none the less. Thanks to an outing by a has been and a venue that I put on my “do not go to” list, I’m feeling the exposure. Everytime I think of something to write about, I imagine the greasy faces of people thinking about me.

I party blame BW for her trying to turn the blog into a promotional wheel for a bunch of shitty things that happen in this town. Reviews are fine. But glorification is completely out of the question. JUST BECAUSE SOMETHING HAPPENED DOES NOT MEAN IT IS A GOOD THING And then inviting lame people to co-blog. It’s been tough. And the exposure is for real.

I hate this shit.

I became Sewerboy during my stint in the nation’s butthole, Washington D.C. I had two co-bloggers and we swore a fucking blood oath that we would respect the blog. We talked shit like mother fuckers. Our intent was the bring the whole fucking shitty down. One fucking post at a time. Carried on the name to this blog. BW came up with a throwaway name like BW. And the rest is history. Hell, I was more anonymous in my LJ phase 10 years ago!

It’s time to get mean and abandon Moco Feast for greener pastures! Later ya’ll. I only liked one person who I knew read this blog. Because she’s the only one I told about it!!! WILL MISS YOU MUCH!

Posted in Uncategorized

Corpus is shit

Corpus Christi has always had a reputation for being a shitty city. We don’t exactly export culture (outside of a few exceptions like Selena) and we’re usually late to pick up on any nationwide trend. Bands will actually just pass us by. Porkeria from McAllen passed right by Corpus on their tour last year. Many touring bands bypass Corpus for the rich scenes in the Valley.

We Corpus Christians have really had to do it ourselves. So, how’s that working out?

Granted this is a limited sample of failed experiments, but it’s pretty illustrative of the problem. I’ve complained previously of how bad the crowds are here. Now, I’ll add a new complaint: the promoters. Yesterday was supposed to be a Corpus showcase. Five bands were scooped out of the SXSW music festival and booked to play The Texan along with some Corpus staples. The SXSW bands hailed from as far away as Brooklyn. This was our chance to show the outside world that we can hold fun events. We have passionate music fans and our own local acts that can rival any comers.

Nothing of the sort happened.

I’m not too clear on the details, but I’m willing to say the whole show was a hoax on me. Not that the whole world revolves around my fat head, but the show was slated to start at 5, and I showed up at 7 and no one was there. No out of town bands. None of the promoters. Just me and a biking buddy. Apparently one van had trouble and that prevented all five bands from coming to Corpus. They made it from the far corners of the continental United States, but the casual 4 hour drive from Austin killed them. I don’t buy it.

A few people did straggle in in ones and twos to see see the concert. Everyone was disappointed. The promoter really screwed the pooch with this one. Unless there are circumstances that I don’t understand or were never made public, I’m going to chalk this one up as a colossal fuck up. What makes it worse, is that probably no one cares. Corpus is a joke.

There was also a major fuck up on Saturday. An all day musical extravaganza.  I showed up at 10 PM. The show started at 3 PM and due to the electro heavy booking, I decided to skip all that shit. I guess everyone else had the same idea and skipped the show all together. Another showcase show that was nearly empty. The show was booked tight. Bands had set times. It was supposed to run like clock work. I was there for an hour and a half before the first band started up. There were less than 10 people watching them.

CORPUS IS A DISASTER.

And these were free shows. Tomorrow is another “taste of Corpus” type all day show. It is 12 dollars. All local bands, from what I understand.

Will it be attended?

Is Corpus the biggest joke of a town you’ve ever heard of?

Do you wish a real hurricane would just wipe us out so we’d quit embarrassing ourselves?

Is this one of the reasons why Corpus has so many ODs?

If I died on my bike tonight, would my legacy be that of bitchy Corpus blogger?

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Corpus as a Cat Walk

I’ve never lived in a city quite like Corpus. People in other cities never cared what I wore or my state of hygiene. That would be considered gay. And if they knew me, they would know I didn’t give a fuck.

But my dearest friends in this fucking town can’t help but comment on my state of dress every time I see them. This is extremely annoying to me for several reasons.

  1. Corpus ain’t a fucking cat walk. What you wear here isn’t going to splash the pages of a major alt-fashion magazine.  You may look as cool as those cute Williamsburg bros, but you’re still in a lame city where few people are going to notice your high priced threads.
  2. Fashion should be individualized. I haven’t bought an article of clothing in over a year. And most my wardrobe consists of the same stuff I wore in High School.  I am far from fashionable, but I think I have created my own unique brand. With this mindset, the last thing I want to hear is that I need to hit up the Mall or Old Navy for some hipper clothes.
  3. I didn’t think out these points before I started puking them out, so this one is a continuation of point 1. Where exactly do these wannabe hip cats display their fashions? The ones who personally critique my fashion choices don’t go anywhere where anyone would give a shit what they wear. They rot at Coffee Waves or grab a drink at Vernons. They are not even close to attracting the copious amounts of stinking pussy they infer that they should be getting because they are wearing a horizontally striped form fitted shirt.
  4. Why do people want to look like everyone else? Maybe it’s my punk ethos, but I’ve never understood that dude mindset of comparing shoes and shirts and even fucking pants. There’s something extremely gay about being excited about what another person f the same sex is wearing and inquiring where they got it.
  1. Clothes should be first and foremost functional. I don’t know how females work, but dudes’ needs are simple. They need to have dexterity of movement. I think that’s about it. Everything else is a garnish. So, the skinny jeans and the form fitted shirts and loafer type shoes are all ridiculous to me. I ride my bike and I sweat and I live to love. If I can’t do those things, then I will pass on those clothes.

I’ve had dudes giggle as I approach them due to my state of dress. I don’t even know how to react. I don’t want to look like them. I’m not offended by their derisive looks and comments. I could care less. If you look like a faggot and you care what I wear then the onus really falls on me to stop being your friend. If it bothers me that much. But it really doesn’t. I just find the whole thing to be eminently ~bloggable~ so here I am. Dishing it out like a bitch with a warm wet nose full of boogers.

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Filling a Toilet Bowl with Puke

I like to puke in my own damn toilet and relish in my own damn stink in my own damn home. But last night I did the puking in a friend’s toilet.

The combination of booze out the ass and pot always sends me to queer street. I should have known better, but I seem to have to learn this lesson every few months. Queer street is not the worst place to be. When I’m at home reeling from nausea and vomiting, I kind of like it. Turning your head becomes an epic struggle. And listening to sweet sounds becomes an otherworldly experience.

But at a friends house? Mother fucker, it sucks. I just leaned back on my friend’s bed and pretended to post up and look chill. But  was completely out of balance and about to spew up my guts. And when it became to much to bear and I stumbled to the toilet, my high compatriots were confused.

Does this not happen to anyone else who combines the two drugs?

^^ An example of the sweet soothing sounds that can make the spins a religious experience.

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

I just kept drinking!

Getting off to a late start this week. Sunday and Monday I decided to go out drinking till real fucking late and sleep through any possible job that might have been available. I sat my ass down and promised myself I would nail a job for tomorrow, but it’s already too late. I refreshed that fucking page till my F5 button caved in. Nothing popped up. Well, I’ll get to sleep in again. FUCK YEAH!

Valentines Day is a real bullshit holiday. Last year, BW and I went to Golden Corral and ate until we were uncomfortably stuffed. I think we just rubbed each other’s bellies all night because we were both in such agonizing pain. On the way out, I remember stealing something. It was a really good day.

But I’m listening to friends with girlfriends talk about their big plans. Jeez. One is going to fork out nearly 200 hundred bucks for a couples massage.

A single friend of mine called me up and we went to a coffee shop last night. He whipped out his lap top and started showing me all of the potential dates for today. I was impressed that he had such high hopes. Calls up the biggest babe of them all and snags a date. I looked through my phone and I literally don’t have any female numbers. No close female friends who I can have a friendly Valentine’s dinner with. So I ate with my cat. And now she’s sleeping on my lap.

It was a pretty good day. Typically uneventful, but okay.

Posted in Uncategorized

Weekend Roundup

Had a busy as hell weekend. As a non-creator of art or culture, I see my role in Corpus Christi as that of patron. I try to attend as many free events as possible.

Attending a free event on Friday was not possible, so I begrudgingly forked out the 5 bucks for the Not My President show at House of Rock. Billed as a Punk show by punks for punks, I was pumped. Biked down there and caught the last few songs of Ick Vulnick (sp?) and couldn’t have been less impressed. Nice girls. But, their bland alt-girl version of punk leaves MUCH to be desired. The constant trading off of musical instruments would be more compelling if any of them showed a whiz-bang knack for any instrument. Not exactly the case with this band.

Next was Circle of Vultures. They sound like Black Metal to me. I’m no connoisseur of that type of music, but the label works for me. And they are fucking cool. I look forward to seeing them again soon. I hear they are looking for new instrumentation for a fuller sound.

Corrupt Bastards was next. Probably the most reliably punk rock of all the bands that I saw that night.

Then a band from Beeville played. Did not catch their name, but they are a three piece with both bassist and guitarist switching off singing duties. Reminded me of early Pennywise or any 90s Epitaph band. Not a bad sound.

SATURDAY

Went to the birthday party show at Turban Sues. Caught the last two bands: Chili Wolf and Corpus Gold. I’ve sang Corpus Gold’s praises on this blog before. They put on a damn good show. And I firmly believe that any group is Abel is going to be something I like. Chili Wolf played a punky garage rock style. Pretty damn cool.

The Turban Sues show was almost overshadowed by the 14 year old drunk girls. Two little drunks twats were pitting into the streets and band throughout Corpus Gold’s set. The proprietor of the establishment gave them what seemed like 500 warnings to knock it off. But they persisted. So, fucking punk rock. Eventually a barrier of alt-dudes formed to keep the little bitches from running out into the street again. I helped out with this effort and grabbed the girls before they could make it into the street. The girls would have been more forgivable if they were cute. But, they were little ugly trolls. With pants so tight that even when I caught the site of a little butt crack, it was a huge turn off. The pants made it look like their butt crack went half way up their back. Disgusting.

I had one final stop on Saturday and that was to see Dan P’s  “other” band at The Texan. I didn’t catch their name. I think the last (of three) words is Commando. It’s a two piece with Dan on guitar and masked man behind a drum kit. Sample heavy and riffy as all hell. I loved it. Really made my night when I gave Dan my compliments and he told me to go fuck myself.

Other things:

  • On Saturday, two of my meals were chicken leg/thigh combos.
  • I worked in a print shop all day Saturday. It was fun
  • I’ve noticed that people love handing me fliers while ignoring my friends. I guess my patron status is appreciated by the art-creators in Corpus Christi!
  • Biking in the wind/rain/cold hell that was Corpus Christi this weekend impressed no one but myself. People just acted like I was stupid.
  • New noise punk to bring this post to a close. Fucking crank it dkYBG7G6J4g!

 

Posted in Uncategorized

New approach

It’s funny how my neurons work. If I’m pissed off at night, I usually wake up in a chipper mood. If I have a good night, I usually wake up upset. This morning was definitely the former.

In fact, I look forward to the flattering chiding my friends will give me about BW’s new beau.

But enough about that shit.

Today I’m going to continue my quest to watch every single John Ford movie. I finished all of Hitchcock the other day. And I finished Orson Welles and Kubrick years ago. It’s part of my quest to watch every movie by every director on this list. Fellini is almost done.

This project makes me an insanely boring person. Most people have seen one or two movies by these directors. And they, of course, fucking love talking about those one or two movies. But, I’m trying to fucking clean up. Watch em all.

Today, I will be watching The Long Voyage Home.

Also, to add how boring of a person I plan on being when I’m old and mature, I’m attempting to read every book on this list.

I’m about 2/3s through The Iliad. I gave it a shot a few years back but got so bored I threw it under my bed. This time my progress is for real. It’s still boring and repetitive as hell, but I’m literally muscling my way through.

 

Posted in Uncategorized